Forgiveness and Revenge

[Scamula]

What do you all think about forgiveness? Is it a truly a "gift you give yourself" or is it for pussies? Does the fact that you forgave the person erase the consequences of their actions or not? Do you all find it easy to forgive? Do you all seek revenge when you've been wronged? If so, what are the things that you've done?

I find forgiveness very very hard to do as I don't see the purpose of it really and I am also quite revengeful for I take no shit. Unless the person asks me for forgiveness, why the hell am I going to give them something that they didn't ask for? If they felt whatever they did was wrong, then perhaps they themselves would try to make amends or maybe they wouldn't have done it in the first place.

Even if the person does beg my pardon, I would not let it negate the consequences of their actions even if I did forgive them. We all have to pay for our choices in life.

I do seek revenge when I feel I've been wronged and I will not feel fully whole again until I've executed reprisals. I will hold a grudge until the extinction of the cockroach. Some may say its immature, but I think it is mature and adult to be real with yourself and admit to yourself your innermost desires. To hold a grudge and execute retaliation takes the adult virtues of planning and forethought, especially if you aim to do it properly so that it cannot kick back at you (I should know...I've done it before). If someone has hurt you, then you have a right to make them bleed in return. Letting people get away with it reinforces the rightness of their behavior and maybe they'll dog someone else.

[SayItAintSo014]

I couldn't agree more. I feel the exact same way. It's extremely hard for me to give somone a second chance.

[DoctaD]

Ive learned in my short time on this earth that revenge isn't sweet... the idea of revenge is sweet. The idea of revenge is fuckin' awesome, but once it's passed, it's nothing to be proud of...

...unless it's something petty. He kicked me in the balls, so I kicked him back! Ha, bastard got kicked in the balls... petty shit doesnt count.

However, when it's different... when it's close and personal. When family members have had teeth knocked out and can't see out of one eye, then something comes into play. I have to get these fuckers, I have to make these fuckers pay... I have to kill these fuckers.

Ive never killed anyone.

...but when this adrenaline is over you, things come close. You find your victim; the fucker who done your family wrong. You find him and you make him regret it. You make him wish he was never born, never mind causing that little pain to the family member or person he did. To be honest, for those few minutes it's such a relief. It's fuckin' awesome. You're looking at what little of his face you can see through the blood and you're smiling. You're thinking of the wrong-doings and in your head, you're making him pay, you're putting them right.

It doesn't last long, if you have a conscience anyway. Eventually the apparent justification which you felt within yourself is nothing at all. The fact that he hurt you in some way doesnt matter in the slightest, I guess because you already got him back for what he did. Now, you just think of what happened, of what you did, and probably as much guilt as you feel about it is equaled if not overpowered by the realisation that you can be arrested for this... you could end up in your local prison for a number of charges from assault to attempted murder, and thats not the end of it, either. After that, you could either feel sorry for what you did because of the mental turmoil it has caused you, or you could feel angrier because the bastard is still in your mind, tormenting you... this is all before you find out if he's pressing charges.

So you've had shit done against you or someone who is close to you, you find out he's pressing charges and you're in and out of court for a year with a little bail condition against you. Thats the best possibility. You also have the possibility that you're not done for it, but you havent yet let go...

Hanging on to something that has happened in the past doesn't do you any good. None whatsoever. The only time I condone revenge is when the person you want to (should) get back at comes back to you after everything is over and rubs it in your face, thinking he's off scot-free. Then, and only then, is when I think it's time to make him pay. Of course, you still have everything to think about after that.

Ya know, Ive (had to think) [thought] about this way too much in the past few years. I wish I lived somewhere easy...

[gbu-36]

I agree with DoctaD

And anyways, Ive noticed people seem to get theirs back in due time, and all ya have to do is sit back and watch

[Scamula]

It doesn't last long, if you have a conscience anyway. Eventually the apparent justification which you felt within yourself is nothing at all. The fact that he hurt you in some way doesnt matter in the slightest, I guess because you already got him back for what he did. Now, you just think of what happened, of what you did, and probably as much guilt as you feel about it is equaled if not overpowered by the realisation that you can be arrested for this...

Well I guess I don't have a conscience then.

Oh well, there are worse things to be lacking.

I have felt no guilt after taking revenge...I just don't. They got what was coming. They screwed me over.

And you must cover thy ass and you won't be arrested. Eden Press has excellent books on revenge and many other topics.

The only thing you must be careful of is if the person decides to carry out reprisals against you.

[Scamula]

Ive noticed people seem to get theirs back in due time, and all ya have to do is sit back and watch

I've seen this come to pass. I didn't believe this when you first wrote it, but now I do. :biggrin:. There is a God!

[duiker]

I know you've all probably heard this before but it really takes a lot of strength to not bite back when you have the chance. The "Bigger Man."
People really notice it when you defy your basic instinct.
It's rewarding to hear from people, saying to you that you're "not a sheep."

[Armalite]

Have we all been watching My Name is Earl?